My Creativity Spoken Aloud...

God's Gift

2011-10-21T01:58:00.000-04:00

My days are filled with laughter,
My days are filled with love,
I’ve been blessed with such wonderful things
I certainly feel His love from above.

Things happen as they should,
Things happen for a reason,
Our life plays out God’s plan,
And it certainly tis the season.

He walked you into my life
He set our hearts to bind,
I had finally given up looking,
Then He revealed you at the right time.

We set out on the path together
Our hearts bound together with love,
Now I can’t imagine my life without you
You’ve been blessed from God above.

©
Completed ~ 10/21/11

Moonlight

2011-07-17T13:51:00.004-04:00

By the light of the moon,
I roam here and there,
for I am everywhere...

By the light of the moon,
my heart beats strong
and my strides are long...

By the light of the moon,
my dreams soar high
and my spirit will fly...

By the light of the moon,
I can clearly see,
for I am forever free...

©
Completed ~ 7/17/11

Dead or Alive? Alone & Lost...

2010-10-14T10:22:00.001-04:00

Sometimes I wonder if I'm alive or dead
contemplating the many thoughts running through my head
always living my life on my own
doing things that others condone.

Chitter, chatter, whispering voices behind my back
pushing against my eardrum like a thumb tack
but I keep on moving despite all the friction
I keep pushing forward as if on a mission.

A mission to find what I've always been searching for
searching for that life of peacefulness and so much more
moving forward, going backwards, turning round and round
wanting so much for my soul to soar but feeling forever bound.

Yet feeling cold and alone inside my dark mind
still wondering if I'm dead or alive
the chitter chatter continues as fake smiles shine bright
my eyes closing and losing all sight

Yet the whispers still pass through my thoughts
forever feeling alone, forever feeling lost...

©
Completed ~ 10/14/10

Solitary Traveler

2010-06-09T16:12:00.005-04:00

Trippin’ and stumblin’ through life
Always striving to find myself
Lost my way more than twice
No matter how many times I’ve knelt

Temptation around every turn
Calling my name, testing my strength
Too many times I’ve been burned
Causing my constant arm’s length

The wall’s been built and guarded
My heart’s now made of stone
Always feeling disregarded
Among all, I’m still alone

I know one day I’ll find my way
The way to my lost forsaken soul
There will be no more games to play
And no more losing control

One day the time will come
To melt my heart of stone
And the walls will then crumble
And my soul will be as one…

©
Completed ~ 06/09/10

Dancing In The Clouds

2010-05-24T15:30:00.003-04:00

I close my eyes
Drift to a place high
Dancing in the clouds
With you, how profound
Dancing beside me
With your white wings
Smiling so brightly
Together again finally

Perception of time
No longer binds
My heart's desire
To take me higher
To be beside you
If only you knew
How strongly I felt
In your arms I melt

Here we are now
Dancing in the clouds
No cares in my mind
With you my soul shines
Your wings flutter
And the moves don't matter
Just to be here
Just to be near

A tear escapes
And the dream fades
My heart grows heavy
But I still believe
There'll be a day
We'll find our way
For our souls are bound
And we'll be dancing in the clouds…

©
Written ~ 05.24.10

Struggling With Fear

2009-11-28T23:10:00.008-05:00

Fear is that constant fight
Suffocating all that I am
Pushing with all my might
Struggling with who I am

Fear grabs a hold tightly
Trying to conquer my soul
Pulling ever so slightly
To kill my spirit is the goal

Trying to hold me back
Fear restricts my reach
Like a full blown attack
Draining my strength like a leech

Stripping away my sanity
Stripping away my happiness
Fear holds no boundaries
Constant feeling of helplessness

Wanting to fight back
Scared to let it go
Knowing what I'll lack
Fear is what I know

Every day living with fear
Feeling of incomplete
Wiping away all my tears
Never admitting defeat...

©
Written ~ 11.28.09

Dreaming Of...

2009-11-23T19:39:00.005-05:00

When you're not near
I feel so alone
Your voice I hear
Whispering in my mind

Hoping and waiting for you
Confused and wondering
If you love me too
Or am I just blind?

Smile brightens my life
Though you may not know
Eyes piercing life a knife
Your touch, gentle and kind

I close my eyes
Dream of what could be
Then wake and realize
You were only in my mind

Still so far away
Not close enough to touch
Like that you'll always stay
A heart I'll never find...

©
Completed ~ 11.23.09

The Cross I Bear

2009-11-11T12:45:00.007-05:00

I still ask, why me?
Lord, why was I spared?
Was this meant to be?
A frightening nightmare...

That one fatal night
Changed the lives of three.
For one lost the fight,
And now his soul is free.

The other lost time
And didn't know why
Lucky to be alive
In the hospital he lie.

Then there was me
The only concious one
Awake and alive at the scene
In shock and wanting to run.

The ordeal is long past
But confusion still within.
How long will this last?
Will the pain always win?

Was this Your wakeup call?
From Heaven You reached down
And as I began to fall
Caught me before I hit the ground.

Was stubborn and never listened
Blocked You out for so long
My life's path a downward spin
Knowing but never caring of my wrongs.

You pushed and pulled
At my heart from within
Yet I was always fooled
by the devil and sin.

Then out of nowhere
All three collide
A life changing scare
On that one fatal night...

I didn't know then
Yet it is only fair
Forever pain without and within
This is the Cross I must bear...

©
Completed ~ 11.11.09

Still Dreaming

2009-10-30T20:59:00.008-04:00

My thoughts are taking control,
And my emotions are taking their toll...
My weary soul is screaming,
While my heart is constantly dreaming...

Confusion soon sets in,
And I lose focus once again...
No matter how hard I try,
I can never seem to reach that high...

Just when I think I'm almost there,
And I've taken on all that I can bear...
It happens so very quickly,
That rug is yanked out again from beneath me...

It always seems as though,
That once again I've reached a new low...
Then I'm crawling on my knees,
Gathering my broken spirit piece by piece...

Again my head starts to spin,
And I let my thoughts and emotions win...
My weary soul continues screaming,
And all the while, my heart never stopped dreaming...

©
Written ~ 10.30.09

Just You and Me...

2009-10-28T14:12:00.005-04:00

You take my breath away.
With me, I want you to stay.
Let's go on that magic carpet ride,
Leave everyone and all our cares behind...

No whispers, No stares...
No responsibilities, no cares...
Just you, me, and our passion,
No talk or words, just actions...

Holding each other close,
Cheek to cheek, nose to nose.
Staring into each other's eyes,
No excuses and no lies...

Electricity pulsing through our touch,
Holding on tight, needing so much.
Feeling each other's souls,
While the world around us begins to unfold...

Our thoughts, through our eyes, intertwine.
But I feel like I'm running out of time.
I sense us pulling apart,
I can even feel it in my heart...

I want to stay in your arms for always,
To watch your eyes dance for always,
To kiss your lips for always,
To feel your soul for always,
And then I opened my eyes to awake...

©
Written ~ 10.28.09

This Journey

2009-10-24T21:23:00.002-04:00

Never-ending it always seems
time and time again,
I'm swimming in this sea of uncertainty
wondering if it will ever end.

I'm stuck on this merry-go-round,
life spinning out of control,
But to which I'm forever bound
My mind, body, and soul.

Tired of spinning round and round.
Tired of being so lost.
Hoping some day to finally be found,
No matter what the cost.

Laughter seems so far away,
Smiles and happiness too.
Forever bound my heart will stay,
Until this lonely journey is through...

©
Written ~ 10.24.09

Gone

2009-10-13T10:29:00.004-04:00

Sun rays
flowing from outer space
wash away my smile
I want you to stay awhile.

I reach
to touch your cheek
but you disappear
now you're nowhere near.

Rain falls
and the wind calls
but you don't hear
the falling of my tears.

Spirits soar
but deep in my core
for you my heart burns
and my soul still yearns...

©
Written ~ 10.13.09

You, Me, and Time...

2009-10-12T00:02:00.001-04:00

You have:
Eyes that seem to burn
right through to my soul.
And I begin to wonder,
Can you read my heart?

You have:
a touch like electricity
that sears through me.
And I begin to wonder,
Can you touch my heart?

You have:
a smile that blinds me
yet lights my day.
And I begin to wonder,
Can you warm my heart?

If only you knew that it's:
The way you look at me,
the way you move,
the way you feel,
the way you groove,
the way you taste
the way you smell
the look on your face
only time will tell...

Only time will tell,
if we're meant to be.
Only time will tell,
if you really love me.
Only time will tell,
if you are the one.
Only time will tell,
if you will run...

©
Written ~ 10.11.09

"Confused"

2009-10-07T11:33:00.002-04:00

I had some thoughts written down after a break-up last year. I came up with this poem after re-reading those thoughts the other day.
Enjoy...

I don't understand
why you did what you did.
How can you love someone,
yet be so very cold?
You act as if
I never existed.
I lost count
with all the lies you told.

I deserve better,
I thought you were different.
It didn't take long
for your true colors to shine.
Thought you were an angel
from Heaven sent.
Now I realize
it was just all in my mind...

©
Written ~ 10.05.09

"When?"

2009-10-07T11:25:00.007-04:00

In a crowded room
Full of people
And I'm screaming
But no one looks
No one hears...

Look at me!
I want to be seen
I want to be carefree
I want to be loved
I want to be heard

I want to feel
The wind in my hair
The sun on my face
The laughter on my lips
The love in my heart...

But I ask...
When?

©
Written ~ 09.30.09

"You"

2009-10-01T22:36:00.005-04:00

I found this poem in an old journal this past weekend. I don't even remember writing this one. Enjoy...

Blue skies, arms wide
dreaming of flying, instead of crying
thoughts of you
fill my heart
and my soul
lonely no more
my eyes dance, with excitement
just for a moment
by your side
floating on air
dreams of you
fill my sleep
and your smile
lights my days
with those eyes
piercing through mine
see straight into my soul
no questions asked

©
Written ~ 06.21.06

How can you learn?

2009-09-29T23:54:00.008-04:00

Decided to take a break from the old work and post a new one that I just wrote the other day. Enjoy...

How can you learn to trust again
When all your life you've been let down?

How can you learn to smile again
When all you can do lately is frown?

How can you learn to laugh again
When you don't want to make a sound?

How can you learn to live again
When you can't even stand your ground?

How can you learn to love again
When you feel your heart is still bound?

©
Written ~ 09.29.09

Lost & Confused

2009-09-29T23:48:00.007-04:00

You were here and now you're gone.
Was it all just a dream?
What I thought was a strong bond,
was my mind playing tricks on me.
Nay, not my mind but instead my heart.
I should have known right from the start.

You used me and never looked back.
You moved on with your life without me.
I'm trying to get back on track.
I'm trying again to be free.
But my heart still aches for you.
Wondering if you're thinking of me too.

Do I ever cross your mind at night?
When you're lying in bed all alone?
Do you wonder why I didn't fight?
Wondering if my heart was made of stone?
Wondering if I was playing with your mind?
I wonder if you're really that blind...

I don't understand what you needed.
What else was I supposed to do?
Even when I sat and pleaded
Trying to show my feelings were true,
I believe you would still be there...
With you, my life I wanted to share...

©
Written ~ 10.04.07

"Will You Be There?"

2009-09-29T23:37:00.005-04:00

Sometimes I feel as though
I'm falling down that rabbit hole.
But what I really want to know,
Is will you be there?

Life is not always clear
And I harbor so many fears
And just as many tears.
But will you be there?

Will you be there to hold my hand?
Will you be there to help me land?
Will you be there when I demand?
Tell me, will you just be there?

Forks in the road of life.
I want you to be my guide
Helping me never lose sight.
So will you be there?

Even when my heart grows cold
And my harsh opinions unfold
And my tongue lashes grow bold...
Will you still be there?

Will you be there to hold my hand?
Will you be there to help me land?
Will you be there when I demand?
Tell me, will you just be there?

When I suffer from defeat
When my body and soul is beat
And I feel the need to retreat,
Then will you be there?

Sometimes I need to be rescued
And I don't know what to do.
And sometimes I just need you...
I want you to be there...

Will you be there to hold my hand?
Will you be there to help me land?
Will you be there when I demand?
Tell me, will you just be there?

©
Written ~ 05.25.07

Written For M.F.

2009-09-29T23:22:00.005-04:00

So many sacrifices you made for me
but I was too blind and I couldn't see
how much you really loved me.

Your face still haunts my thoughts
remembering how hard you fought
but back then to you, I was lost.

The love you gave I threw away.
There was nothing more you could say
to change my mind and make me stay.

Others were there more oft than you,
the times we spent together were so few,
yet there was nothing more you could do.

Years later I look back and realize this,
that you and your love is what I truly miss.
I'd give anything to have just one more kiss.

To be held in your arms just one more time,
to stare into your eyes that were so kind,
I sometimes wish that once again you were mine.

Back then your pleas were all in vain.
And now, my tears I shed are the same.
For our heartache, I am the one to blame.

Now you're just a distant memory,
constantly reminding and taunting me.
Too late, I now realize of what could be...

©
Written ~ 04.04.07

"Realization"

2009-09-29T19:31:00.005-04:00

I refuse to be caught up in the thought of you anymore.
My mind made you to be what I wanted you to be.
I don't think I ever knew the real you.
Only what you wanted me to know.
Never knowing what was truth and what was fiction.
You pulled the strings of my heart,
Playing for your own satisfaction,
All the while making me believe it was for mine.
And when I wasn't looking, you disappeared.
Leaving this void in my life, wondering where you went.
The longer you're gone, the stronger I become.
Once again I'm wading through this sea of lonliness
Even when I'm surrounded by bodies.
The smile on my face is fake,
masking my true identity, my true self.
The act I put on for the sake of others,
Helps me through the bright days.
Laughter is forced even when my eyes are dancing.
Everyone sees a happy shell,
But yet it is cold inside.
And the chill is sometimes unbearable;
Yet I cower away from the warmth,
Hiding behind the smile and the laughter.
I walk through life on my own...

©
Written ~ 04.03.07

"I'm So Over You"

2009-09-29T19:25:00.004-04:00

I open my eyes
Wipe the tears away
Drink in the sunlight
It's a brand new day.
And I'm so over it.

I pick my head up
Clear my thoughts of you
I have had enough
I realize we're through
Now I'm so over it.

I'm ready to move forth
Without you by my side
Let life take its course
No more will I cry
Cause I'm so over it.

Over those eyes that dance
Each time you smile at me
Over those working hands
That held me so gently
But I'm so over it.

Over your rough raspy voice
I could listen to all night
Over your kisses so moist
How your lips felt so right.
Yet I'm so over it.

My mind is now free
My smile is so bright
My eyes clearly see
My heart is healed right
Cause I'm so over you...

©
Written ~ 04.04.07

"For My Friend..."

2009-09-28T09:42:00.004-04:00

Remember the days
where we laughed so hard
that we cried.
Where we laid in the grass
to watch clouds float by.
Not a care in the world.
Wishing on shooting stars,
climbing trees,
wishing we could fly,
the twinkle in our eyes,
and mischievouness in our grins.
When love was so simple
and life was so full.
Running free like the wind
with the sun on our faces.
Pain was only physical
instead of so emotional.
We were no longer children
the moment you first kissed me.
All innocence is lost now
since the years have passed.
We've grown our separate ways,
yet the friendship still remained.
You've since moved on from this plane,
But I still meet you in my dreams.
Knowing that you rest high above
watching and looking over me,
you're the one that I'll never forget,
in my heart you'll always be...

©
In Memory of Cory Fye
Written ~ 03.27.07

"Fear"

2009-09-27T18:35:00.004-04:00

I feel as if I'm drowning
Trying to catch my breath...
Struggling...
Only to be pulled further under.
Confusion has set in.
Pain has always been there
But now is unbearable..

My only escape used to be
My own dream world.
But now it's creeping,
seeping through into my slumber.
Now I awake
With tears on my pillow
And fear in my heart...

Afraid to be alone
Afraid that you'll never be.
Afraid to turn around
And find that all is gone.
Wondering through this world
Like a lost soul.
Passing through other lives
Never finding one of my own.

Too much chaos
That I cannot be found.
Why didn't I know
This was how it's going to be?
Talking to myself
Just to get through the darkness.
Unable to shake the fear,
The confusion...
The pain...
The aching...

I ache and yearn,
Yearn to be found.
Yearn to be touched.
Yearn to be alive.
Yearn to be loved.
Yearn to be something to you.
Yet I am still invisible.
You see right through me
As if I don't exist.
I bared my soul
Only to get pain in return...

©
Written ~ 03.27.07

"Lost"

2009-09-26T09:27:00.006-04:00

As I roam, in this world all alone,
The battle rages on, and my soul is the pawn.
Where love is lost; and you paid the cost.
Now you're above, with wings of love,
Looking down on me; wandering free...
With guilt weighing me down, I cannot be found.

And the battle rages on, my soul still the pawn.
I struggle every day, searching for my way.
You're no longer by my side; and many tears I have cried.
To the heavens I yell, asking why it was you that fell.
I was blind and couldn't see, what really was in store for me.

So the battle rages on, with my soul still the pawn.
I roam the streets at night, searching for the light...
When suddenly I felt free, as He quietly spoke to me.
Out of the heavens He came, calling me home by name.
And then all of a sudden I knew, what I was left here to do.

So the battle is done, and my soul has been won.

©
Written ~ 01.10.07
This one is one of my favorites!

Untitled Thoughts....

2009-09-26T09:11:00.002-04:00

So I used to write poetry back in high school. I had a lot of great writings that even my English teacher approved of. However, I made the mistake of rendering my notebook full of poetry to a friend for criticism. I never got it back and as far as I know is still lost to this day...

Over the years I've written a few here and there, but I never wrote as much as I did in high school. I've since gathered the few writings that I currently have and they are stored together in a journal. I'm going to share some old ones over the next few days....
Enjoy!

Untitled

Staring into space
With a smile on my face
Thinking about you,
The boy in baby blue,
Of how you make me feel
And how you're trying to steal
My heart away from me.

One look into those eyes
Doesn't take me long to realize
That everything I've been looking for
What my heart was yearning for
I found, was not that far away
And all I needed one day
Was to open my eyes and see.

©
Written ~ 07/21/05

Here's another one...

Untitled

I close my eyes
And let my mind
Take me to a place
Where I feel safe.
Where things are the same
Away from all the pain
Where there are no more tears
And you are always near
Where love is for always
Instead of just a phase..

©
Written ~ 07/22/05

And So It Begins...

2009-09-25T22:56:00.000-04:00

I've created this blog because I was inspired by a twitter friend, Fred aka SmoothBiker, who had separate blogs for his ramblings and for his poetry. Since I love sharing my poems after I finish writing them, I figured, what the hey, why not create a separate blog for just my own poems?

My first post is not of one of my poems however, but of a poem that I came across a few years back that inspired to try to start writing poetry again, among other things in my life...

I'll be posting up some of my poetry in the next few days and hopefully I can get to writing some new ones soon!

"Don't Quit" by Jill Wolf

Don't quit when the tide is lowest,
For it's just about to turn;
Don't quit over doubts and questions,
For there is something you may learn.

Don't quit when the night is darkest,
For it's just a while 'til dawn;
Don't quit when you've run the farthest,
For the race is almost won.

Don't quit when the hill is steepest,
For your goal is almost nigh;
Don't quit, for you're not a failure,
Until you fail to try.